The Facebook Lie. A Virtual Fake ID or an Academic Boost?
I have a solid rule in my house, no Facebook until you’re 13. Period. I just didn’t think it felt right to allow my kid to enter a fake birthday in order to meet the Facebook terms and create a profile. It seems hard to approve that and then say you can’t lie about other stuff.
But in many ways, I wish I hadn’t made the rule. I can’t back down now so thankfully a September birthday will solve it all very shortly. But when I got this e-mail from a totally awesome HPISD teacher, I wondered if the remaining holdout parents of 12 year old 7th graders should give in and let it go, you know, for academic reasons. Maybe I should have given in sooner.
I have a class Facebook set up and encourage the kids to add me as a friend. I am on for about a half hour to forty-five minutes a night a few days a week and tutor through Facebook. It allows the kids to ask questions, check on homework and assignments and get time with me once school is out.
This is a teacher who is spending her own time in a strategic cyber-locale to help kids succeed in her class. Rock. Star. But should parents let their kids lie to be more academic?
29 comments to "The Facebook Lie. A Virtual Fake ID or an Academic Boost?"
I just wanted to tell you, this is an awesome and perceptive post. As parents in 2010 we now face issues like this every day. I don’t pretend to know all the answers to tweens-using-the-internet questions like this, but I love how you spotted this issue perfectly, and framed it for all of us (parents, teachers, teens) in the form of a piercing question.
While I can appreciate the enthusiasm of this teacher wanting to engage with her student where she thinks they are… I don’t see this as responsible behavior to encourage the use of sites like Facebook for tweens.
If they have questions for this teacher, they should just be able to e-mail her.
“All sources of information, including, [sic] hearsay, rumor, anonymous tips, photographs and information posted on the Internet, including such social networking sites as Facebook and My Space will be investigated and may be considered by the Assistant Principal to determine if a violation has occurred.”
What student would want to let the school district in his or her business?
I remember when my sr was in 7th grade they had a totally cool awesome teacher who said ” I’m on facebook (actually then I think it was myspace) and if I catch any of you on there I will call your parents!!”
How about that!
Whos the teacher???? VERY inappro.
I agree that the kids “friending” a class room is probably risky for them if things get a little wild on their personal profile BUT that’s what it is, friending a classroom. The teacher isn’t putting this stuff on the same profile with her college buddies. She has set up a classroom page just for that purpose.
I have another child with a summer birthday and he started school when he had just turned 5. There are kids 14-17 months older in his grade. Crazy.
Food for thought:
http://jezebel.com/5628554/facebook-wont-shut-down-stalker
a
Not just because of the article she linked. I mean, signing “a” can freak people out. Doesn’t she watch Pretty Little Liars? http://www.tvfanatic.com/2010/07/lucy-hale-reveals-key-pretty-little-liars-spoiler-who-is-a/
I’m the mom of three. My youngest just turned five and is a redshirt kindergartener. We held him back because he is not ready, not because everyone else is doing it or because we wanted him to excel at sports.
Like many parents, we made this decision based on discussions with his teachers, the director of the preschool and the public school principal. We believe giving him another year before his official kindergarten year was the right decision for him, and we’re thankful that we can afford to give him that extra year to mature.
On the Facebook issue, we have a “not until your 13″ rule, too. But we’re also sticklers about movie ratings.
Outside of school, thirteen/8th grade is an appropriate age to start Facebook, but I think parents need to carefully set up the account together to make the privacy settings very private, be their child’s first friend, know their kid’s password, check the account using the password to make sure there’s nothing unsavory going on, and monitor friends–at least while their in middle school. Facebook encourages letting everyone see things about you and many of the privacy settings default to that. I know some parents think that they’re invading their kid’s privacy, but letting them friend anyone they want and not paying attention to what they’re posting is not good parenting. You also don’t want your kids broadcasting your vacation plans to 500 of their closest “friends.”
My only thought is this – and I’ve wanted to shout this out for a long time – if your kid is on facebook, look at his/her page regularly. My kid has always been very open about his facebook, he’ll leave his computer open with the facebook up all the time and doesn’t care if I sit and read it (I’ve never had a facebook page). WOW it’s eye opening sometimes. Many, many of you really need to go have a look at your kids page. And not the edited version they allow you to see from your own facebook – go look at it when THEY are signed in. Some of you are going to freak out if you follow my advice – I promise you. Raunchy, inappropriate, bizarre – I’ve seen it all. And from “good kids”, successful, achieving kids – no way their parents are seeing this stuff, words and pictures. I don’t think you need to know everything your kid says or does, but this is posted on the internets, it can be saved, cached, whatever and return to haunt you forever.
http://education.ning.com/forum/topics/1027485:Topic:40246?id=1027485%3ATopic%3A40246&page=2#comments
http://www.coppa.org
Sheesh kids, figure it out for yourself, or ask your teacher the next day at school.
“he will photograph their dork with a document camera, put it on Ning and people can comment”
Now I know what the problem is!
Leave a Reply